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Lyrics that absolutely bug the crap out of you

Started by PPI Tracy, February 16, 2011, 02:12:16 PM

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PPI Tracy

This has absolutely nothing to do with the paranormal, but due to a comment on a recent discussion thread, it got me thinking.  I felt compelled to post this question to you all, if for no other reason than to get it out of my system.

Okay......what lyrics absolutely bug the crap out of you?  Like nails down a chalkboard perhaps or that make zero sense and have always perplexed you.  Here is my offering and it's clearly from the Department of Redundancy Department:


              "Only time will tell if we stand the test of time"
                                   Why Can't This Be Love? - Van Halen  (Van Hagar)

PPI Karl

That Van Halen lyric points to one of my pet peeves about lyric writing:  laziness!  You know what I mean:  when songwriters can't think of what to say next, so they just put any ol' crap into the song to keep it moving.

I've always really, really hated the lyrics to "Happy Together" by The Turtles.  (I also hate the music, which means, I guess, I just hate the damned song altogether.)  Right at the end of the song, after the hundredth time you've listened to "me and you and you and me and me and you . . ." as well as "so happy togetherrrrrr . . . " and "bah-ba-ba-ba-bahhhhh," out of nowhere is the line "How is the weatherrrrrrr?"  WTF?!  Why not "Plump up your featherrrrrrs" or "Mink oil the leatherrrrrr" while you're at it!  Stupid.  And so creatively laaaaaaazy!
If you want to end your misery, start enjoying it, because there's nothing the universe begrudges more than our enjoyment.

PPI Tracy

Oh....and the ever popular..."Keep on Using Me Until You Use Me Up"  (Bill Withers, Aaron Neville, Al Jerreau...pick your singer)

"Just keep on using me, until you use me up.  I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know...I knoooowwww..."


|8x

PPI Tracy

Here is another little ditty:

"Pump up the jam, pump it up, pump it, pump it, pump it, pump up the jam, pump up the jam, pump it up"

How come it's just jam? It's all about the jam. What about the peanut butter? That's a little rude.  What happened to equal opportunity?


(god, this is fun)  >:]

PPI Brian

LOL! Glad to know I'm not alone. Most lyrics don't make any sense.
How about "Blinded by the light"? This song always bugged me.

Check this verse - and it gets worse. Bet you didn't know who wrote these lyrics  ;D


Madman drummers bummers and Indians in the summer with a teenage diplomat
In the dumps with the mumps as the adolescent pumps his way into his hat
With a boulder on my shoulder feelin' kinda older I tripped the merry-go-round
With this very unpleasing sneezing and wheezing the calliope crashed to the ground
Some all-hot half-shot was headin' for the hot spot snappin' his fingers clappin' his hands
And some fleshpot mascot was tied into a lover's knot with a whatnot in her hand
And now young Scott with a slingshot finally found a tender spot and throws his lover in the sand
And some bloodshot forget-me-not whispers daddy's within earshot save the buckshot turn up the band

And she was blinded by the light
Cut loose like a deuce another runner in the night
Blinded by the light
She got down but she never got tight, but she'll make it alright

Some brimstone baritone anti-cyclone rolling stone preacher from the east
He says: "Dethrone the dictaphone, hit it in its funny bone, that's where they expect it least"
And some new-mown chaperone was standin' in the corner all alone watchin' the young girls dance
And some fresh-sown moonstone was messin' with his frozen zone to remind him of the feeling of romance

Yeah he was blinded by the light
Cut loose like a deuce another runner in the night
Blinded by the light
He got down but she never got tight, but he's gonna make it tonight

Some silicone sister with her manager's mister told me I got what it takes
She said I'll turn you on sonny, to something strong if you play that song with the funky break,
And go-cart Mozart was checkin' out the weather chart to see if it was safe to go outside
And little Early-Pearly came in by her curly-wurly and asked me if I needed a ride,
Oh, some hazard from Harvard was skunked on beer playin' backyard bombardier
Yes and Scotland Yard was trying hard, they sent a dude with a calling card,
he said, do what you like, but don't do it here
Well I jumped up, turnedaround, spit in the air, fell on the ground
Asked him which was the way back home
He said take a right at the light, keep goin' straight until night, and then boy, you're on your own

And now in Zanzibar a shootin' star was ridin' in a side car hummin' a lunar tune
Yes, and the avatar said blow the bar but first remove the cookie jar we're gonna teach those boys to laugh too soon

And some kidnapped handicap was complainin' that he caught the clap from some mousetrap he bought last night,

Well I unsnapped his skull cap and between his ears I saw
a gap but figured he'd be all right

He was just blinded by the light
Cut loose like a deuce another runner in the night
Blinded by the light
Mama always told me not to look into the sights of the sun
Oh but mama that's where the fun is

Copyright - Bruce Springsteen (ASCAP)  

"Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence."--Carl Sagan

PPI Tim

That cat's name is a alley oop. Alley oop, oop, oop be doop.
If you have heard this song, good luck trying to get this song out of your head ;D
Sounds interesting...Go on.

PPI Tracy

Oh...oh..OHHHHKAY.....the one that just drives me bat-sh*t is:

The Boys Are Back in Town....

"....and if the boys wanna fight you better let em"

Really?  Or WHAT?  What if I DON'T wanna let em?!  Huh?  HUH?!

PPI Tracy

Brian, do you know how many times I have sang that song and not really REALLY known what it said?  Especially that second sentence.  Ewwww.  Bruce, you're so gross.  The entire SONG is gross!

I'm scarred for life now.

PPI Tracy

Quote from: PPI Tim on February 16, 2011, 04:45:04 PM
That cat's name is a alley oop. Alley oop, oop, oop be doop.
If you have heard this song, good luck trying to get this song out of your head ;D

You.  Are.  Mean.

...oop...oop..oop...ooop...ooop

PPI Debra

I haven't been able to make heads or tales out of any Lady Ga-Ga song.
"If you're after gettin' the honey, don't go killin' all the bees." -Joe Strummer

PPI Jason

Quote from: PPI Brian M on February 16, 2011, 04:13:11 PM
Cut loose like a deuce another runner in the night

I'm glad you explained this one. I always thought he was saying, "Revved up like a douche I gotta clean these pants tonight." But the song still doesn't make any sense to me.

I guess as a musician I have never been bother by lyrics too much. But what has really bothered me is the annoying music itself. I agree with Karl, that Turtle's song bulooows!!!

But in High School the one song I truly hated was "Tequila." I was in the band and I loved concert season because we played some amazing songs. I had the opportunity to perform Tchaikovsky's 1812 Overture, The Planets by Gustav Holst, The Nutcracker Suite, Stars and Stripes Forever, and one of the most amazing versions of America the Beautiful you will ever hear.

And yet, every year, I also had to sit in the bandstands and play with the "Pep band" during football games. And we had to play Tequila over, and over, and over, and over. If there is a piece of music that could ever be called "Anti-Music" then Tequila is it. Literally. If you play it and it comes into contact with real music then they both would instantly annihilate into pure energy and take most of California off the map.
Probably the earliest flyswatters were nothing more than some sort of striking surface attached to the end of a long stick.
-Jack Handey

PPI Tracy

Quote from: Debra, PPI Consultant on February 16, 2011, 07:42:09 PM
I haven't been able to make heads or tales out of any Lady Ga-Ga song.

Rah rah oh la laaa, ro ma oh la la, ga ga oh la la, I want your jammy pants.  Don't want your slippers, don't want your robe, you caught me in my jammy pants, ooohh oooh ooooohh oh oh oh oooohh ooohh, caught in my jammy pants....

PPI Tracy

Quote from: PPI Jason on February 16, 2011, 08:34:49 PM
Quote from: PPI Brian M on February 16, 2011, 04:13:11 PM
Cut loose like a deuce another runner in the night

"Revved up like a douche I gotta clean these pants tonight."

Shoot coffee out of nose: "CHECK"

PPI Karl

Ah, those adult silly-songs!  Every generation has had at least one it holds revered.  One generation made an entire genre out of it: scat.  (In fact, I think rap music that does the nonsense thing--we'll call it "crap-rap"--might just be the inheritor of the scat tradition.)  I don't regard these, either, as novelty songs ala Dr. Demento.  From Bing Crosby's "Mairzy Doats" to Manfred Mann's "Blinded by the Light" to Kid Rock's "Bawitdaba," nonsense songs have always separated themselves from the pack of novelty ditties because they somehow manage to be "cool"; they're written through the filter of whatever pop temperament (or whatever drug, let's face it) happens to be dominant at the time.

Probably one of my all-time favorite nonsense-song groups was Cocteau Twins, who quite often (there were exceptions, though) strung together random phrases to create extremely cool lyrical effects.  In fact, thanks to the brilliant lead singer Elizabeth Frazier, the vocals were almost not lyrical, but instead amazingly tonal.  "Iceblink Luck":  loved it!
If you want to end your misery, start enjoying it, because there's nothing the universe begrudges more than our enjoyment.

PPI Debra

Quote from: PPI Karl on February 17, 2011, 12:21:13 PM
Ah, those adult silly-songs!  Every generation has had at least one it holds revered.  One generation made an entire genre out of it: scat.  (In fact, I think rap music that does the nonsense thing--we'll call it "crap-rap"--might just be the inheritor of the scat tradition.)  I don't regard these, either, as novelty songs ala Dr. Demento.  From Bing Crosby's "Mairzy Doats" to Manfred Mann's "Blinded by the Light" to Kid Rock's "Bawitdaba," nonsense songs have always separated themselves from the pack of novelty ditties because they somehow manage to be "cool"; they're written through the filter of whatever pop temperament (or whatever drug, let's face it) happens to be dominant at the time.

Probably one of my all-time favorite nonsense-song groups was Cocteau Twins, who quite often (there were exceptions, though) strung together random phrases to create extremely cool lyrical effects.  In fact, thanks to the brilliant lead singer Elizabeth Frazier, the vocals were almost not lyrical, but instead amazingly tonal.  "Iceblink Luck":  loved it!

The Cocteau twins manage to make nonsense surrealistically beautiful.
"If you're after gettin' the honey, don't go killin' all the bees." -Joe Strummer

PPI Karl

Quote from: Debra, PPI Consultant on February 17, 2011, 12:28:13 PMThe Cocteau twins manage to make nonsense surrealistically beautiful.

Yes!  Perfectly said, Debra. :)
If you want to end your misery, start enjoying it, because there's nothing the universe begrudges more than our enjoyment.

PPI Brian

My favorite nonsense song of the sixties was (and still is) incredibly cool. Loved the reference to Lewis Caroll's "The Walrus and the Carpenter" from the book "Alice Through the Looking Glass". Lennon later said he composed the lyrics from three song fragments that he nearly abandoned, and the cadence of the lyrics was inspired by a police siren late at night. There is a dramatic reading that was added to the recording directly from an AM radio station in the final mix. Ironically, it was a BBC broadcast of Shakespear's play "King Lear". Put on your EVP headphones and see if you can make out the following lines of dialog:
"Now, Good Sir, what are you?"
"A most poor man, made tame to fortune's blows, Who, by the art of known and feeling sorrows, Am pregnant to good pity."

------------------------------------------------------------------

I Am The Walrus
Lennon/McCartney

I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together.
See how they run like pigs from a gun, see how they fly.
I'm crying.

Sitting on a cornflake, waiting for the van to come.
Corporation tee-shirt, stupid bloody Tuesday.
Man, you been a naughty boy, you let your face grow long.
I am the eggman, they are the eggmen.
I am the walrus, goo goo g'joob.

Mister City Policeman sitting
Pretty little policemen in a row.
See how they fly like Lucy in the Sky, see how they run.
I'm crying, I'm crying.
I'm crying, I'm crying.

Yellow matter custard, dripping from a dead dog's eye.
Crabalocker fishwife, pornographic priestess,
Boy, you been a naughty girl you let your knickers down.
I am the eggman, they are the eggmen.
I am the walrus, goo goo g'joob.

Sitting in an English garden waiting for the sun.
If the sun don't come, you get a tan
From standing in the English rain.
I am the eggman, they are the eggmen.
I am the walrus, goo goo g'joob g'goo goo g'joob.

Expert textpert choking smokers,
Don't you thing the joker laughs at you?
See how they smile like pigs in a sty,
See how they snied.
I'm crying.

Semolina pilchard, climbing up the Eiffel Tower.
Elementary penguin singing Hari Krishna.
Man, you should have seen them kicking Edgar Allan Poe.
I am the eggman, they are the eggmen.
I am the walrus, goo goo g'joob g'goo goo g'joob.
Goo goo g'joob g'goo goo g'joob g'goo.
"Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence."--Carl Sagan

PPI Tracy

God.....that song is an LSD trip on paper.  Just saying....


The one group that writes very interesting lyrics are "The Cars".  (who by the way are coming out with their first album in 24 years, this May!)

They have a specific style of writing.  I heard what they call it, only once, which was many years ago.  I cannot remember what it was called but again, it was a very specific kind of writing. 

Bye Bye Love - The Cars
i can't feel this way much longer
expecting to survive
with all these hidden innuendoes
just waiting to arrive
it's such a wavy midnight
when you slip into insane
electric angel rock and roller
i hear what you're playing
it's an orange sky
always it's some other guy
it's just a broken lullaby
bye bye love
bye bye love
bye bye love
bye bye love
substitution mass confusion
clouds inside my head
were fogging all my energies
until you visited
eyes of porcelain and blue
could shock me into sense
you think you're so illustrious
you call yourself intense

and the ultimate trip out:

I'm In Touch With Your World - The Cars
you can tuck it on the inside
you can throw it on the floor
you can wave it on the outside
like you never did before
you get the diplomatic treatment
you get the force fed future
you get the funk after death
you get the wisenheimer brainstorm

i'm in touch with your world
so don't you try to hide it
i'm in touch with your world
and nobody's going to buy it
it's such a lovely way to go

i've been lying on your feathers
you keep talking about the weather
i'm a psilocybin pony
you're a flick fandango phoney
it's a sticky contradiction
it's a thing you call creation
everything is science fiction
and i ought to know