James Randi Speaks

[PPI Karl]

I've been to Vegas twice, and even though the second time I went was for a school conference, each Vegas visit entailed a pilgrimage to the site where my best friend was killed.  I hadn't really thought about it until now, but if we go to Vegas next summer, I will have to go to Flamingo and lay a wreath on the median.  Hope that doesn't put anyone off.

[PPI Tracy]

Doesn't put me off at all, Karl.  I think it is a beautiful remembrance of your friend. 

[PPI Debra]

I've been to Vegas twice, and even though the second time I went was for a school conference, each Vegas visit entailed a pilgrimage to the site where my best friend was killed.  I hadn't really thought about it until now, but if we go to Vegas next summer, I will have to go to Flamingo and lay a wreath on the median.  Hope that doesn't put anyone off.

I agree with Tracy, Karl.

[PPI Karl]

I truly appreciate your understanding.  As several posts in the Dream Analysis boards will attest, Mike's unexpected death was harder on me than even my father's death.  I guess, when the people with whom we had the most complicated relationships pass away, our grief and resolution are just as complicated.  That was March of 1999, and I'm still grieving.

Anyhoo, though . . . Skeptical inquiry kicks ass!  James Randi:  woohoo!  I honestly don't know if James Randi is actually going to be at the conference, in person.  He's quite elderly now.  However, I would very much like to honor his contributions and courage while he's still alive, so let's try to make this happen if we can.  The good thing is, Vegas hotels can be gotten on the cheap.  And, we can opt to fly into Vegas for not too much money, or we can pack up the car(s) and drive their, ourselves.  

For our PPI Team members, we have some funds available to assist with this, too, as long as we all approve of their use for this--at the next meeting.

[PPI Tracy]

Karl, everyone grieves in their own way and in their own time.  No two people grieve the same.

It has been 21 years since my father died and everytime I hear the song, "The Living Years" by Mike and the Mechanics, I crumple into a ball of tears.  Can't get through it no matter what.  I miss him dearly, but I know that he is in a better place.  At least that is what I believe.  I also believe he is with me and can see me, even if I cannot see him.  I know that he probably hurts everytime I do.  Sometimes, it is just cathartic to do so.  Sometimes it just feels good, in an odd sort of way, to cry my heart out.  It's healing...yes, in an odd sort of way. 

If you need to grieve, let yourself do so.  Let yourself feel what you feel....until you don't feel it any longer.

[PPI Karl]

Karl, everyone grieves in their own way and in their own time.  No two people grieve the same.

It has been 21 years since my father died and everytime I hear the song, "The Living Years" by Mike and the Mechanics, I crumple into a ball of tears.  Can't get through it no matter what.  I miss him dearly, but I know that he is in a better place.  At least that is what I believe.  I also believe he is with me and can see me, even if I cannot see him.  I know that he probably hurts everytime I do.  Sometimes, it is just cathartic to do so.  Sometimes it just feels good, in an odd sort of way, to cry my heart out.  It's healing...yes, in an odd sort of way. 

If you need to grieve, let yourself do so.  Let yourself feel what you feel....until you don't feel it any longer.

[PPI Brian]

Karl, everyone grieves in their own way and in their own time.  No two people grieve the same.

It has been 21 years since my father died and everytime I hear the song, "The Living Years" by Mike and the Mechanics, I crumple into a ball of tears.  Can't get through it no matter what.  I miss him dearly, but I know that he is in a better place.  At least that is what I believe.  I also believe he is with me and can see me, even if I cannot see him.  I know that he probably hurts everytime I do.  Sometimes, it is just cathartic to do so.  Sometimes it just feels good, in an odd sort of way, to cry my heart out.  It's healing...yes, in an odd sort of way. 

If you need to grieve, let yourself do so.  Let yourself feel what you feel....until you don't feel it any longer.

I don't know how I missed this thread, and for that I'm truly sorry.

I agree with Tracy and Debra. There should be no expected time limit on grief. It's up to us to determine when we have mourned sufficiently, and society has no right to tell us what constitutes an acceptable length of time. Grief and mourning are never discussed in polite society. They are subjects of conversation that most of us avoid, and learning to deal with grief is a dark and uncomfortable place that nobody wants to venture. Grief is a journey that none of us want to experience, but we are bound by our human experience to find a way to accept the loss of loved ones and find a way to get back to "normal". We heal, and we find a way to go on and the pain lessens over time. But then, out of nowhere, it's right there in your face again. At least that's been my experience.   

[PPI Brian]

The Compass Trick:

How to Squash a Paranormal Claim:

[PPI Karl]

Karl, everyone grieves in their own way and in their own time.  No two people grieve the same.

It has been 21 years since my father died and everytime I hear the song, "The Living Years" by Mike and the Mechanics, I crumple into a ball of tears.  Can't get through it no matter what.  I miss him dearly, but I know that he is in a better place.  At least that is what I believe.  I also believe he is with me and can see me, even if I cannot see him.  I know that he probably hurts everytime I do.  Sometimes, it is just cathartic to do so.  Sometimes it just feels good, in an odd sort of way, to cry my heart out.  It's healing...yes, in an odd sort of way. 

If you need to grieve, let yourself do so.  Let yourself feel what you feel....until you don't feel it any longer.

I don't know how I missed this thread, and for that I'm truly sorry.

I agree with Tracy and Debra. There should be no expected time limit on grief. It's up to us to determine when we have mourned sufficiently, and society has no right to tell us what constitutes an acceptable length of time. Grief and mourning are never discussed in polite society. They are subjects of conversation that most of us avoid, and learning to deal with grief is a dark and uncomfortable place that nobody wants to venture. Grief is a journey that none of us want to experience, but we are bound by our human experience to find a way to accept the loss of loved ones and find a way to get back to "normal". We heal, and we find a way to go on and the pain lessens over time. But then, out of nowhere, it's right there in your face again. At least that's been my experience.

Those James Randi vids were extremely enjoyable! Thanks for posting them, Brian.  And thank you for your words about grief. We are, no surprise, completely sympatico on this issue. Every year we memorialize Glenn, I'm also gearing up to memorialize my friend, Mike, who died on March 9.  This year makes 19 years since he died, and I've resolved that I'm probably not ever going to let myself get over it.  Sometimes, you just learn to live the rest of your life disabled by a particular grief, and that's just how it goes.  I think most of us are getting by, day by day, in a state of functional bereavement. It's just a matter of how and where we channel it. I might not have come to meet all of you, in fact, if I Mike's death weren't still so fresh for me in 2006, so that's one hugely positive, lucky consequence of it. 

(As I write these very words, Billy Graham's funeral procession is heading to Charlotte, North Carolina.  I mean no disrespect to his grieving family, but here's a case where the world as I experience it is greatly improved by not having one man in it to fan the flames of hatred in the name of love.  )